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The End of Preschool Celebrated with Hysterical Father

May 14, 2010

Well, I’ve been afraid of changing
‘Cause I’ve built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Children get older, I’m getting older too
Yes, I’m getting older too…    

I was feeling Stevie Nicks’ words a little on the drive to Sam’s preschool program tonight.     

It was our very last preschool program. For eight years, I’ve had a child in it.  And my last one finished his preschool career tonight.     

I’d love to have a sentimental story to tell about Sam’s program.  If you thought that this was going that way, sorry to disappoint!    

Sam and his future bride were “Jack and Jill.”  Jill was asked to wear leggings because she does come “tumbling after” and no one wanted her to flash the parents at the preschool program.  Her mom wasn’t happy with the look, but I thought she was darling.    



I waved to Sam from the balcony, and he smiled for the camera and didn’t wave.  Afterwards, he rushed to tell me that they’d told him not to wave.  Didn’t want me to feel snubbed, you know?    

At one point, my little daughter-in-law-to-be got a little squirmy.  She was talking to her neighbor, Little Miss Muffet or  Little Bo Pete, and her mom gave the universal “shhh” sign.     

This was met with a series of gang inspired hand gestures that were quite humorous.    

All in all, it was a cute program.  And soon, they’ll be moving along to kindergarten.  My heart may break when that day comes, but tonight, the end of preschool was sort of a relief.   That’s one hurdle that stood between us and summer vacation that is now cleared!    

Afterwards, we walked over to a spring festival that our town holds each year.  There were some rides, vendors and games set up tonight.  It’s the first year that I can remember it being clear and sunny.     

My husband, who willingly set up a zip line at the top of a rickety ladder and encouraged my children to fly through the air, fears that these carnival rides aren’t safe.     

I tend to agree.  I can’t remember to pack shoes and underpants for my crowd when we go on vacation, I can totally see how an important screw or bolt or two would get left behind in each city.     

Legend has it that Wayne’s father rode the swings once, and the chain broke and the swing came off, and he landed on a tent.  This story has been recounted to me every single time I’ve been exposed to a midway ride with my husband.    

But, it was a carnival and the kids wanted to ride, so we strolled over to the ticket booth, exchanged a pound of flesh for a few tickets and went riding.  The kids wandered through a fun house or two.  They took a spin on the bumper cars.     

It wasn’t long before my dare-devil middle child spotted one of those big pirate ship rides that rock back and forth.  My husband decided to ride it with him.    


In the mean time, we’re in a small town, so of course, I was visiting.  And I wasn’t all that close to the ride he was on.  I’d put Sam on the swings, curious, I wanted to see if lightning would strike twice in this family and he’d end up atop a tent.      

But, while I was watching him and doing a little chatting, I hear screaming. Girl screaming. Coming from the pirate ride.  There were four people on the ride.  All fellows.  Two were members of my family.     

I’m trying to hold up my conversation, but I keep hearing that scream.      

I’m distracted.     

 And then I’m baffled.      

Is Mack okay?    

But the screaming isn’t coming from Mack.    

It is my husband.  He’s screaming and he has my son in a head lock.     

Take note of the fearful expression, white knuckles and son in headlock.


  This picture doesn’t do his caterwauling any justice.   I couldn’t keep up my end of the conversation, what, with my husband in mid-hissy, several yards away.    He shrieked  every time they went backwards into the air.  If he were just playing around with Mack, he was certainly drawing a lot of attention to himself while he was doing it, I thought.     

I’m thinking, “Dang Wayne, tone it down a little, why don’t you?”    

But, after only a few minutes of this harrowing ride, my husband yelled for the ride operator to let them off.     

Scaredy cat  Wayne, then proceeded to tell the nice “carny” that the height on these needed to be much taller, a kid could fall out.  Heck, he could have fallen out.  The height needed to be at least 7 feet.   And where were the harnesses and seatbelts?  That bar was so loose, it did nothing.  On and on he went.     

I suspected a flash back from the swing event involving his father.    

I can only imagine the scars.    

All in all, it was a good night.  Pretty much sums up my children’s childhood.  Successful kids, crazy parents.    

Anyone that thinks I’m a wingnut, has not met him.     

Sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you don’t.     

It was nice giving someone else a turn!     

And, I love that squealing crazy man!    

19 Comments leave one →
  1. May 14, 2010 11:55 am

    I LOVE that ride. It no longer comes to our county fair, but it was called the Sea Dragon. One of my all time favorites. I always had to sit on the end to be sure to get as high as it would allow.

    I think it’s so funny that you call her your future daughter in law…what if it really ends up that way? How crazy that would be.

    Oh, and I adore Stevie Nicks. Landslide is one of my favorite songs. Remember the vlog I did that first brought you sniffing around my blog? The song choice was between Landslide and the one I did. Funny, huh?

  2. May 14, 2010 1:33 pm

    LOL!!!!!! I loved the photo of Wayne and Mack in the headlock. Mack’s face of pure delight and Wayne’s face of horror was hilarious (but not to Wayne, I am sure). Keep writing, girl! I enjoy your blogs so much!

  3. May 14, 2010 1:37 pm

    What a great post! It was sweet and sad at the beginning, and then sooo funny by the end!

    It’s funny what you said about the end of preschool. I think one thing that is making it easier for me with Kate is that I know I’ll be going there for 3 more years.

    Your husband is totally scarred by his childhood experience! I was surprised by the screaming, but didn’t expect him to actually stop the ride and tell off the carnie!

    I’ve never heard the word “caterwauling”. Is that a Southern word? 🙂

  4. May 14, 2010 2:19 pm

    I love that story!!!! Oh my gosh! My dad loves rides and a couple eyars ago we took him to an amusment park and he was like a little kid at age 65!!! He went on a ride just like that and he screamed and screamed like a girl – but he was having fun and wanted to do it again.

    My husband did not, nor did my daughter and I won’t go on rides anymore, so they opted for the rollercoaster again!

  5. Bridget permalink
    May 14, 2010 3:04 pm

    My side hurts!!! I cannot stop laughing when I think of Wayne screaming! We must put him on a ride or two with a camcorder around. I swear we’ll make millions!!

  6. May 14, 2010 4:17 pm

    I was tearing up and then that picture of your hubby and the screaming. OH MY GOSH! That was fabulous and I’m sure he’s so glad you captured it for posterity’s sake and of course, the Internet’s.

  7. May 14, 2010 5:35 pm

    That was absolutely hilarious. And can I tell you? I have never been on that ride, but if I ever do, I’ll probably have the same reaction. Hee.

  8. Monica permalink
    May 14, 2010 8:24 pm

    Oh my word! Poor ole Wayne, he can’t help it. 🙂

    Bridget, that sweet baby of yours looked adorable!

    And I can’t stop giggling. LOL

  9. May 14, 2010 9:39 pm

    You just crack me up! I’m crying at the beginning, sighing in the middle, and laughing at the end! BTW – Natalie does NOT do those kind of rides anymore…thankfully, hubby does. So I’ll be standing and taking pics as the kids and dad ride.

  10. May 15, 2010 7:46 pm

    I was laughing so hard at your description of your husband on the ride! Awesome! And we both have boys the same age…Connor will be starting kinder this fall, too. My baby! Sigh.

  11. May 16, 2010 2:25 pm

    Hey, I gave you an award on my blog…

  12. May 17, 2010 5:49 am

    OMG! LOL! that is so funny! And I absolutely HATE that ride myself!

  13. May 17, 2010 1:02 pm

    LOL That picture is hilarious!! I think it might be good for some blackmail in the future! I am such a scaredy cat when it comes to rides. I like my feet firmly planted on the ground thankyouverymuch!

  14. May 17, 2010 8:03 pm

    WOW! what great pictures. LOL this post really cracked me up!

  15. May 17, 2010 9:27 pm

    Wow, what a transition in pics. But, the latter ones are a crack up. It’s so funny that although you may not know a person, there is a universal scream/yell/yelp thing that happens on those crazy rides. Great pics!

  16. May 18, 2010 12:33 am

    I’m with hubs – I hate carnival rides! I’m convinced they are put together far too quickly to be safe. If people can die at Disneyland, then you had better believe they can die at little fairs!

    Of course, I never would have been down for a roof top zip line either! 🙂

    But congratulations to Sam for graduation!

  17. May 18, 2010 4:15 pm

    That is so freaking hilarious! Don’t tell your hubby that we’re all laughing at him, ok?


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